Black Jealousy

I confess. . .

I’m jealous. There are some people in my life that I love, that I really care for and pray for. And, when I look at their lives, I get jealous. So jealous, in fact, that it’s keeps me from reaching out to them. It keeps me from being honest. I close down my heart because their lives look way cooler than mine.

Jealousy is indeed a trap. While I cut myself off from them, in order to keep from being exposed, all of us are missing out on blessings – from each other. We could all be sharing, learning, growing, but because I’m swallowing jealousy, like a deadly pill each morning, I cut myself off from what might make me better.

But, I wonder. Is it really a choice? Do I simply stop being jealous? Do I tell them??? I know I need to go to God about this, yet I feel petty doing so.

Ah, yes. Diminishment. That’s another pill I’ve swallowed. I can’t go to God about this because, well, it’s so stupid!

Oh, the jail cells we keep ourselves in.

What are the lies, the “pills” that you’ve swallowed this morning?


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